Recent Articles

Straight Men Whisper Their Secret Gay Desires / Queerty


Straight Men Whisper Their Secret Gay Desires

Thanks to the advent of social media sites like Reddit and Whisper, we are now privy to people’s most intimate thoughts and desires.

More and more straight men have been using these anonymous online platforms to share their deepest, darkest secrets. We’ve seen them open up about accidental visits to gay bathhouses, their love of anal play, and doing gay things while stoned. And it never ceases to fascinate, amaze, and excite to us.

Scroll down to read straight men’s confessions about their secret gay desires…

I'm a straight man but i kinda want a man to force himself upon me
I'm a straight guy but I want to use a dildo on myself
I want my gf to watch me with another guy.
I'm straight, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to blow and be blown by another guy.
I'm a straight guy, but I want to feel a muscely guy up
I love it in my butt, and I'm a straight male
I consider myself straight, but if I had to have sex with a guy, I'd do it with a guy 20 years older than me.
I've been having amazing straight sex lately but this guy has been trying to seduce me and it's kinda working. I'm a guy 20
I really want to give another guy head as a group of girls watch!!
I'm straight but show me a guy with a nice ass and I can't help but stare
I'm a straight guy and I just had my first kiss, it was with another dude.
I love to finger my self I'm a straight guy
I am a straight guy but lately I have been having fantasies about being convinced/coerced to suck a guy
I'm really curious as to what it would feel like to be fucked....I'm a straight guy tho
I pretend to be a girl on whisper and get guys off. I'm a straight guy

Graham Gremore


Mar 1, 2015







  • @demented: You made some interesting points, but I take issues with some of them.

    First of all, you suggest that people in the ancient world were mostly bisexual, but offer no proof other than the lives of several people in those time periods. I’m not doubting your statement that they may have been more open-minded when it comes sexuality, but find it hard to believe that the majority of the population could be deemed bisexual.

    Second of all, you compared straight and gay men having sex and relationship with people that were outside of their orientation as if the situation were the same. Gay men had to form relationships with women in order to survive and/or to avoid suspicion. Straight men on the other hand had no reason to other than maybe curiosity.
    As for the denying of their supposed attractions to same-or opposite attraction, perhaps they were being as clear as possible to clear all ambiguity regarding their sexuality, while you took it as more like “the lady doth protest too much, me thinks”.

    All in all, I see it more of a difference of perception. If a straight guy told me he wouldn’t mind having sex with a guy when he’s really horny, I really won’t think of him as any less straight, he just wants to get off. But I know others who would love to peg him as bi.

    I hope this was coherent. I’m not really proficient at writing things down, especially with English not being my native language.

  • Not sure I believe these whispers all came from straight guys, but I do know, from personal experience, that men are just as sexually fluid as women. Even given that a certain percentage of straight guys who have hit on me — and that I have hit on — are simply not yet aware of their homosexuality, there are a great many straight men who enjoy sex with another man. Why this is so under the radar, and seemingly never shows up in sex surveys, I am not sure, but from my anecdotal POV, many straight men enjoy sex with other men,

March 1, 2015 | 0 Comments More

Bisexual/Bi-Attractional/Bi-curious/Questioning Therapy Group

Bisexual/Bi-Attractional/Bi-curious/Questioning Therapy Group

Date/Time: TBD
Location: The Center for Relationship and Sexual Health
Facilitated by Paula Kirsch, LLMSW

This group explores what it means to be bisexual, the invisibility of the bi population, de-stigmatizing and normalizing bisexuality, coming out, dealing with relationship issues, depression, anxiety.

For more information, please email [email ;protected]. Or call 248-399-7447.

February 18, 2015 | 0 Comments More

Bi Girl Dating Website |

January 11, 2015 | 0 Comments More

This Gay Man's Guide to Bisexuals | The Drew Duality

View original post here:   This Gay Man's Guide to Bisexuals | The Drew Duality

January 9, 2015 | 0 Comments More

No Bisexuals

“Nobody’s bi, that’s just a gay guy who sometimes bangs a lady.”

The aspect of works of fiction where there is a lack of bisexual characters despite the prevalence of bisexual people In Real Life, and often don’t even acknowledge their existence. Although some series don’t address any sexuality specifically, even gay characters tend to be more numerous. Almost any character in a same-gender relationship or professing a same-gender attraction is assumed by the others to be either gay or joking. If the existence of bisexuals is acknowledged, they’re usually depicted as

very promiscuous and totally defined by sex


and sometimes even as predatory

(mirroring prejudices leveled against real life bisexuals). A few characters do manage to use a version of

Ambiguously Gay


avoid scrutiny


Hide Your Lesbians

). A function of this is when a character who has been seemingly heterosexual until this point falls for a member of their own gender, they jump the fence and become


interested in their own gender from that moment on; the possibility that they might be bisexual is never even brought up. The trope especially purports that there are no bisexual


, particularly in Western productions. Some female characters, due to the

Girl-on-Girl Is Hot


Sweeps Week Lesbian Kiss

rules, can explore all sides of their sexuality as much as they want, especially if they’re identified as


or plain


. However, such characters will rarely call themselves bisexual. Meanwhile, since male characters often act as the

Audience Surrogate

, their sexuality has to be strictly heterosexual, lest the show be forced into the

Minority Show Ghetto

. This trope is, of course,

not truth in television

in the sense that bisexuals exist. It

isTruth in Television

in the sense that bisexuals, unfortunately, have often been faced with prejudice and disbelief from hetero- and homosexuals alike on the grounds they ‘have to be’ one or the other, personal testimony of said bisexual people be damned. In

Real Life

, this phenomenon is occasionally called

Bisexual Erasure

. See also

Suddenly Sexuality


A Threesome Is Hot

. Compare

If Its You Its Ok

, where an otherwise gay/straight character express interest in someone outside their usual target zone with nary a mention of the B word. Contrast

Bi the Way


Depraved Bisexual

. Also contrast

But Not Too Bi

, which is essentially this trope in reverse – a character who is established as bisexual yet only shows interest in one gender. The polar opposite of

Everyone Is Bi

, where either an unusually high number of characters seem to be at least mildly bisexual or sexuality is never presented as an issue.


open/close all folders

Anime and Manga

  • This is the controversy among the fandom which the title character of Haruhi Suzumiya faces regarding her sexuality, even though she is clearly attracted to both Mikuru and Kyon, and actually spells it out in the first episode:

    Haruhi: I don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl!

  • In the yuri manga Indigo Blue the main character, Rutsu, is pretty clearly bisexual – though she prefers women, she admits to having had genuine feelings for her ex-boyfriend and to sometimes enjoying sex with men. However, her decision to accept her attraction to women and begin a same-gender relationship is consistently referred to as “becoming a lesbian” or “sinking into lesbianism”, which not only avoids use of the term “bisexual,” but implies it to be some kind of irreversible process (i.e. she can never go back to dating/sleeping with men now).
  • The fifth manga of Sailor Moon, called simply STARS, featured cross-dressing Sailor Senshi named the Sailor Starlights, and one of them, Sailor Star Fighter, has feelings of affection towards Sailor Moon. They are not a major part of the storyline, and Star Fighter only makes it clear in passing. But when this became a major part of the anime adaptation, Sailor Stars, Star Fighter and the other Starlights became physical males in their civilian forms to keep Usagi from being seen as a maybe bisexual. Naoko Takeuchi was not amused by this in the slightest, although she stopped short of disowning the anime. The anime itself only acknowledges this awkwardly in one scene where the Starlights’ Princess asks Fighter “You take these forms on earth?” and Fighter nervously responds “To attract only women, this form was easiest”.
  • Despite the tendency for Yaoi Genre manga to have an Everyone Is Bi trend, many or most don’t say that the characters like men and women and tend to go more for the trend of “Straight, just dating/in love with a man.” Despite having a clear interest in men/a man, bisexuality often isn’t even considered in-universe and these characters either automatically come to the conclusion that they’re gay (or “gay now”) or spend their time insisting that their current partner is as exception.
  • Minto from Tokyo Mew Mew is Ambiguously Bi – she expresses a rather excessive admiration for her Oneesama Zakuro (including a love confession that could go either way), but also seems interested in boys, most notably when Ichigo asks the Mews what they find attractive to and Minto thinks of a male dancer. For some reason, the 4Kids dub changed this, switching the image of a dancer into a picture of Zakuro, tremendously increasing the Les Yay. Given that 4Kids obviously isn’t all that keen on queer characters in childrens’ tv shows, the only sensible reason anyone’s been able to come up with to explain this is that they were less willing to have a subtextually bi character than a subtextually gay character.

Comic Books

  • In the Adventure Time comic Adventure Time Marceline And The Scream Queens it is quite obvious that Marceline and Princess Bubblegum are experiencing sexual tension in their relationship. This is evident in Marceline’s clear jealousy of Bubblegum’s feelings for fellow bandmate, Guy, and Bubblegum’s reaction to Marceline admitting to said jealousy. However, many fans argue that Bubblegum’s attraction to Guy means that she could not possibly have an intimate relationship with Marceline.
  • John Constantine of Hellblazer. In issue 51 he mentions that he’s had a few boyfriends, though it remains lip-service bisexuality until the “Ashes and Dust in the City of Angels” story arc, where he seduces and is shown (in very tasteful silhouettes) having sex with the guy he is conning at the time.
  • Though averted in X-Factor, in which Rictor and Shatterstar (both men) have a relationship even though Rictor was previously interested in a female teammate and Shatterstar is taking a leaf from Captain Jack Harkness, it is played painfully straight by many of the book’s readers, who responded with confusion and dismay, not because of the relationship (well, some because of that, but they’re not relevant here) but because it was clearly blatant disregard for continuity (in their eyes) to show someone being interested in women in one issue and men in another. It’s also played (somewhat) straight in the comic itself: while Shatterstar is happily and enthusiastically bisexual, Rictor is gay, and always has been, deep down.


  • In Slash Fic, when a character previously known only to get involved with a different gender, reveals his having a same-gender attraction, it’s quite common for another character to respond with something along the lines of “But you were married!”. It’s also quite common for characters previously known only to get involved with a different gender to have an attraction to or hook up with someone of the same gender and suddenly realize that they’re gay. It would make a lot more sense in most cases for them to be bisexual.
  • In the Psych fanfic Lassiter Learns How to Bend and its sequels, Lassiter has a gay acquaintance from his academy days, Russell Santos, who claims that there is no such thing as bisexuals, even though his own partner of fifteen years lived with a woman before they got together. The partner himself is quite adamant about the fact that she was not his beard, but that he was in love with her for real. Lassiter is understandably miffed when Russell tells him that his relationship with Shawn is doomed because they both identify as bisexual.


  • Brokeback Mountain averted this by having the main characters be bisexual, but pandering to this trope nevertheless led to the movie being marketed as a gay love story.
  • Chasing Amy deals with this trope in-universe, when the bisexual Alyssa identifies as a lesbian for the first half of the film; it’s implied that she considered it easier to deny her attraction to men than to deal with the social ramifications of bisexuality.
  • In Eating Out, when Troy claims to be a bisexual, he is met with every character around him shouting, “THERE’S NO SUCH THING!!!”
  • I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry is about a pair of straight men who enter into a fake gay marriage, and must pretend not to be attracted to women so that they won’t be found out. While the movie pays lip-service to bisexuality with Captain Tucker’s closing speech, there was no indication that it’s possible for a man to be attracted to more than one gender, and Adam’s character’s affairs with women in the past becomes a major plot point. The entire “conflict” could have been ended if Chuck just said he was bisexual and in an open relationship with Larry.
  • In The Kids Are All Right, which was directed and co-written by a lesbian, Jules has (and quite clearly enjoys) sex with a man, but has crappy sex with her wife. Nevertheless, she continues to call herself gay, not straight or bisexual. Needless to say, this has caused a lot of controversy and is often seen as perpetuating a message along the lines of “lesbians secretly want men”.
  • In Legally Blonde, when a witness is tricked into revealing that he has a boyfriend, this is considered proof he couldn’t have had an affair with a woman; in addition, Elle says “gay men know designers, straight men don’t”. Apparently there are, you guessed it, no bisexuals. The musical version addresses the issue (at least in part) by having the aforementioned boyfriend testify that the witness in question “never, ever, ever, ever swings the other way.”
  • In the film version of Queen of the Damned, Lestat’s canonical male love interests from the novels are nowhere to be found in the film. Nicki’s absence was especially jarring to book fans, considering his crucial importance to Lestat’s backstory (in The Vampire Lestat, it was Nicki’s Stradivarius that he played to wake Akasha). One of the novel’s female characters (who had no romantic or sexual interest in Lestat) was Promoted to Love Interest in the film to compensate for the removal of the other male characters.
  • In Skyfall, James Bond makes a (possibly joking/bluffing) comment to a villain, who is threatening him with rape, about having slept with a man before. This led to talk about whether James Bond – who’s had, and clearly enjoyed, more sex with women than just about any non-pornographic movie character – was gay. No bisexuals indeed!


  • Briefly referenced in Brimstone. Early in the book, an officer points out that a murder victim had “perverse sexual tendencies”. When Agent Pendergast asks what these are, the cop replies that he “liked men and women”. Pendergast then matter-of-factly points out that thirty percent of all men have such tendencies, to which the cop replies: “Not in Southampton [the town where this is taking place] they don’t!”.
  • Sexual orientation in Gone is pretty much always discussed in terms of gay/straight, with no indication that someone could be in between, although there is a lot of controversy involving a certain Zil Sperry.
  • There is an argument amongst the Harry Potter fandom as to whether the subtext suggests Remus Lupin and Sirius Black are romantically attracted to one another. Tonks/Remus shippers argue that Remus’s marriage to a woman disproves this and that the poster on teenage Sirius’s wall of girls in bikinis disproves it also. Of course, they could both be bisexual.
  • In Greg Egan‘s short story Reasons To Be Cheerful, the narrator, due to repaired brain damage, is given the ability to design his own likes and dislikes, starting from a blank slate of general approval. With regards to his sexuality, he starts off bisexual, but decides that he must choose to be either gay or straight, justifying the decision using nearly every stereotype about bisexuality there is.

    “I didn’t want to be bisexual. I was too old to experiment like a teenager; I wanted certainty, I wanted solid foundations. I wanted to be monogamous, and even if monogamy was rarely an effortless state for anyone, that was no reason to lumber myself with unnecessary obstacles.”

  • In Sing You Home by Jodi Picoult, one of the main characters, Zoe, becomes involved with a woman after her divorce. However, she calls herself a lesbian despite the fact that she admits being attracted to and in love with men. Her partner, Vanessa, is a school counselor and frequently counsels LGBT teens, but never mentions any bisexuals.
  • Appears in-story in Stephen King‘s The Stand. When Stu Redman (who comes from a small town in Texas) hears that Dayna Jurgens is bi, he doesn’t even understand the term first. Later, when Dayna flirts with him and kisses him “for good luck” before she goes on a mission, he wonders how she could be a lesbian.
  • Lois McMaster Bujold‘s Barrayar plays with the culture clash of sexuality mores: the Big Bad tries to mess up the Vorkosigans’ marriage by revealing Lord Vorkosigan’s bisexuality. On Barrayar, that’s a taboo (as is pure homosexuality). Lady Vorkosigan, being from a planet where the only rules about sex are “it has to be consensual” and “having kids requires governmental approval”, absently responds, “Was bisexual. Now monogamous,” and has to see the other’s reaction to realize this was an attempt to blow up the marriage. In a later book, Lady Vorkosigan explains that her husband is bisexual, leaning toward soldiers; her own military background lets him have his cake and eat it too. (Brings more meaning to all the times he calls her “my Captain.”)
  • Anne Frank was bisexual, and wrote quite a bit about her attraction to girls and women. Many versions of The Diary of a Young Girl edited these versions out, and their inclusion has often been a factor in having the book banned from schools. (That, and her father‘s input.)

Live-Action TV

  • Liz Lemon of 30 Rock decrees on a talk show in “Kidney Now!” that “There’s no such thing as bisexual. That’s just something invented in the nineties so they could sell more hair products.” However, it should be noted that it’s made obvious Liz is not qualified to give relationship advice.
  • Two of the men (Justin and Max) who have slept with Edina of Absolutely Fabulous became gay, apparently as a direct result (“You sure know how to turn them”). There is no evidence that they were ever attracted to men before, or were at all attracted to women afterward. However, in a episode featuring Whoopi Goldberg she claims that everyone is at least a little bit gay.
  • An episode from the first season of Brothers and Sisters invoked this trope when Kevin was trying to figure out if a guy he was interested in, Chad, was gay or straight. When one of his siblings suggested that the guy might be bi, his answer was that no one is really bi, and that everyone has to “make a choice” eventually. A few episodes later, after they had been seeing each other for a while, Kevin decided that he was mistaken and that Chad was living proof that someone could really be bisexual.
  • Buffy the Vampire Slayer:
    • In the first few seasons, Willow is portrayed as straight: she has a crush on Xander, and has a relationship with Oz. However, once Tara enters the pictures, she’s just “gay now”. The idea that she might be attracted to both men and women is never brought up, which is especially jarring considering the episode where she realises her feelings for Tara make it abundantly clear that she has lingering feelings for Oz at the same time.
    • After Buffy and Satsu hook up in the season 8 comics, several good reasons are given why they can’t stay together, but apparently the main reason is that the former is “not a dyke”. But could she be bi? The possibility isn’t so much as alluded to. Later, we get Kennedy saying “You’re not the only fool to ever wrinkle the sheets with a straight girl”, which is arguably fair, but the possibility that she’s bisexual still isn’t mentioned. Her straightness is treated as just obvious. Even Xander gets in on it: when Buffy admits her attraction to him, he says that he is on the list as a potential romantic interest “right after gay. I rate almost as good as trying to change your sexual orientation. You went through gay to me.”
  • Apparently Mary Beth Lacey was married off to avert initial audience reactions that Cagney & Lacey were a “couple of dykes”.
  • In an episode of Cheers, one of Rebecca’s ex-boyfriends comes to the bar, and she’s thinking of taking him back. When, with Rebecca absent, an off-hand mention of an ex-boyfriend of his own makes Sam realize that winning him back is impossible (which, of course, it turns out to be), and starting off a plot of wondering whether to tell her. Note that he doesn’t say he’s gay until near the end of the episode (when Rebecca’s trying to seduce him).
  • Subverted in the Cold Case episode “Triple Threat”. Chelsea comments that the murder victim, Elena, was a dating a man in high school, and she later saw him in a gay bar. She seems to think that he’s gay, but if Elena found out, he would be willing to kill her to keep it hidden. When the detectives question him he openly states that he’s bisexual. The detectives take him seriously, and he’s quickly (and accurately) dismissed as a suspect.
  • Played for Laughs on the Comedy Central roast of William Shatner, where the other comedians repeatedly and pointedly refer to Andy Dick as “gay,” while the camera cuts to him getting steadily more indignant in the background.
  • Coronation Street:
    • Todd realised he was gay after being in a loving and committed relationship with Sarah for nearly three years. Even after coming out he admitted he still loved Sarah and enjoyed being in a relationship with her but he never entertains the possibility he has an attraction to multiple genders (he previously also dated Candice) and he’s only had relationships with men since.
    • Occurs again with Marcus and Maria’s relationship. Marcus identifies as a gay man who fell in love with a woman. Maria insists that he calls himself straight. Maybe bisexual is the word they are both looking for?
  • Degrassi almost escaped this, but then fell right back into it once The Lad-ette Lesbian Alex was written off the show. When they started the plot, Paige’s feelings for Alex had her confused, eventually coming to terms with not having labels attached. Having Paige openly date guys and Alex at the same time. Alex also said she was bi at the start of the arc, then revealed herself to be a lesbian by the middle of it. Paige stuck with bisexual up until Alex left the show, then it was a ‘phase’ and Alex was ‘the only girl for her.’ And while Degrassi usually has at least one gay or lesbian character (plus satellite romantic interest cast), the line is clearly defined each time.
  • In one episode of Designing Women, Suzanne mentions that she told some guy’s parents that he was bisexual because, “I don’t believe in bisexuals. I figure the rest of us have to choose, so why shouldn’t they?”
  • Desperate Housewives:
    • Katherine found herself attracted to, and eventually slept with, the attractive, female stripper Robin. This would mean she was most likely bisexual than anything, but everyone including her describes her as a lesbian, with the token gay couple flat out stating she can’t have gay feelings for a woman because she is straight and there “isn’t an on off switch”. At no point is bisexuality ever even considered a concept.
    • Bree’s son Andrew, who had been openly gay for many years, returned to Bree’s house having gotten engaged to a young woman. Bree is flabbergasted and quickly suspects (correctly) he is marrying the woman for her money. Again at no point is the idea that Andrew might be bi even raised as a possibility – Andrew himself even tries to insist his homosexuality was a phase.
  • A Story Arc on The Drew Carey Show focused on Carey’s citizenship domestic partnership to Mr. Wick, and a running gag was the two of them being forced to explain away Playboys, or similar “no, we don’t like girls” antics. Admittedly, another attempt to prove they were gay was “owning a bread machine”, so it may just be down to the characters being dumb. Ironically, Drew himself could be seen, among other things, having sex dreams about George Clooney.
  • Kerry Weaver on ER. This was briefly addressed in one episode – Weaver was re-united with her birth mother, but the mother was appalled when she learned of Weaver’s sexuality, asking her how she could “choose” to be that way. Weaver said in no blunt terms that she was “alone in her soul” before she realized she was gay, despite a couple of obviously passionate relationships she had had with men before that.
  • Glee skirts this trope. The show had two characters that appeared to be bisexual, Brittany and Santana. Santana was subsequently revealed to be a lesbian, and with Brittany, the show uses the terms “fluid” and “bi-curious,” rather than bisexual. In another episode, Kurt says that “bisexual is a term gay guys use in high school when they want to hold hands with girls and feel normal for a change” when Blaine, another (gay) character expresses doubt about his sexual orientation. Kurt is quickly called on the double-standard, although in the end Blaine does indeed turn out to be “100% gay” by the end of the episode, losing some weight. Furthermore, Ryan Murphy said that the decision to make Blaine gay instead of bisexual was that “the kids need to know he’s one of them.” ‘Cause bisexual kids don’t need characters who are “one of them”?
  • The character of Callie Torres on Grey’s Anatomy broadened her sexual horizons when she started a relationship with fellow surgeon Erica Hahn. After a spell of sexual confusion Callie affirmed that she enjoyed sleeping with both her girlfriend and her male friend Mark. She was written as a classic, equal-opportunity bisexual. Subsequently people started to refer to her as exclusively a lesbian, with Erica going so far as to say that “You can’t ‘kind of’ be a lesbian”. They later acknowledged that she was bisexual, but other characters still have a problem getting it—when threatened by Callie’s constant presence in Mark’s life, Lexie asked her “How gay are you? On a scale from one to… gay.”
  • Subverted in Happy Endings It’s stated outright that Jane dated girls in college, but it’s portrayed as though she was going through a phase. When an ex-girlfriend comes to visit, husband Brad is over the moon because Girl-on-Girl Is Hot. When its revealed that Jane was actually in love and in a serious relationship with her, it becomes clear that it was more than a phase and Brad becomes insanely jealous.
  • While Hollyoaks averted this trope with several characters, most notably Kris, during John-Paul and Craig’s romance the idea that Craig – who had been involved with several female characters before, seemed to enjoy said relationships, and wanted to stay with his girlfriend Sarah – might be bisexual was mentioned all of once, several weeks after the storyline ended. All that was said on the matter while it was ongoing was:

    John Paul: You have sex with men, in my books that makes you gay.

  • House, despite having a bisexual on the character list in the form of Thirteen, invoked this in the episode “The Choice” – the choice for the patient being straight or gay. That there is a third option is brought up in passing a couple times, but not much is made of it; mainly because the character was entirely attracted to men until he decided to get “fixed” at one of those infamous camps, and claims to have become entirely “straight” as a result, although the other characters mostly don’t believe him when he says this.
  • The L Word:
    • At the end of season 1 Jenny (who earlier in the season was torn between her long-time boyfriend/husband and the first woman she was attracted to) is involved at the same time with both a man and a woman. Both of them are aware of the other and it seems to be shaping up into an interesting poly relationship. However the writers seem to have decided not to pursue the the possibilities of this storyline and Season 2 begins with the guy breaking up with her because she’s clearly more interested in women. (Later on, Jenny’s sexuality gets complex again when she is dating a Transsexual man in the process of transitioning.)
    • Alice identified as bisexual and dated both men and women up through season 2. After that the writers quietly dropped this and by the end of the series she was identifying as a lesbian.
  • Original Law & Order episode “For the Defense”. Bernard and Lupo are protecting a female witness who had a relationship with the victim. Rough quote:

    *Lupo leaves the room*
    Witness: Does he have a girlfriend?
    Bernard: Didn’t you have a girlfriend?

  • Law & Order: Special Victims Unit:
    • The episode “Lowdown”, where “down-low” (ebonic slang for “man on the side”) is described by Tutuola as “closeted black men who have sex ‘on the down-low’ then go back and pretend to be attracted to their wives.” In the entire episode, no variant of the word “bisexual” is used once. Three egregious lines:

    Dr. Huang: You’re not the first woman who’s slept with a closeted man. Sexuality is very complicated. Just because he was gay didn’t mean he wasn’t attracted to you.
    Tutuola: Guess what? That [mansex] MEANS YOU’RE GAY!
    Andy: I love you. That’s why I couldn’t admit who I was… couldn’t leave my family… couldn’t admit I was gay.

    • “Weak”. The prime suspect in the serial rape of a number of disabled and mentally ill women is discounted because he appears to be gay. And not as in, “Oh, he has a boyfriend, never mind,” but the SVU detectives repeatedly saying, “How can he be the prime suspect? He’s gay!”
    • “11×13″, “P.C.”, had a militant lesbian activist clear her boyfriend’s name by coming out and admitting that she’s bisexual. Of course, all the people at the meeting act like it’s a personal betrayal.
  • MTV‘s The Real World: DC features Mike Manning, who is exploring his attraction to men. Despite dating and making out with other men, he still feels an attraction to women. This is hard for his housemates to understand (they think he’s gay, but denying it) and even the guy he dates think he’s in denial about being gay. MTV themselves invoked this as well, by editing the episodes to almost exclusively include his interactions with men. In this article with After Elton, he comes out as fully bisexual and says he prefers men.
  • Michael in My Family came out as gay after nine seasons of being straight. Bisexuality is never even mentioned.
  • Nip/Tuck seems rather biased against bisexuals at times. Lesbian characters demand for bi-curious women to “pick a side”, seeming to think that you can only be one or the other. Many of the people who do show sexual attraction to multiple genders seem to be psychotic and slightly dangerous. On the other hand, Female-Female-Male Threesomes aren’t an uncommon feature of the show.
  • Men in Noah’s Arc are apparently only gay, straight, or closeted (e.g. gay). Even characters who have at least been implied to have had different gender relationships, such as Wade and Guy, are depicted as doing so solely to hide feelings for men or out of a poor understanding of their own sexuality.
  • For whatever reason (or none at all), Queer as Folk never explored or even mentioned bisexuality. But everybody’s gay – except for a few token straight characters. A brief intrigue concluded that if you aren’t either completely gay or totally straight, something’s wrong with you.
  • On Rescue Me:

    “I thought you were gay?!
    “I dunno man, I miss pussy.”

  • Roseanne had an interesting case with Nancy. She would frequently say things such as “Ugh, I’m sick of women, I’m going back to men this week,” and being very blas? about dating both men and women. All arrows point to her being bisexual, but when she came to Roseanne’s house with a male date after coming out, Roseanne and her other friends were confused, asking things such as “Well, won’t they kick you out of the club for that?” They were more confused than anything.
  • In Scrubs Turk and J.D. are completely in love with each other (J.D. showed up drunk at Carla’s bridal shower crying and rambling about how she would never be as close to Turk as he is), but “in a totally non-sexual way”. It’s just guy-love between two guys.
  • Susan from Seinfeld briefly becomes a lesbian, seeing at least two women. One of these women leaves Susan for Kramer until being turned off from men by a coat, and the other was an ex of George’s who remained infatuated right up until meeting Susan. Susan herself eventually returns to George. Despite the fact that the orientations of these three change at the drop of a hat (or coat), each of them is identified by her immediate status at all times, never as bisexual.
  • Despite several seasons of being seen exclusively with men, Sex and the City‘s Samantha briefly became a lesbian during the show’s fourth season… then returned to heterosexuality immediately after. (And lampshaded thereafter, “When I was a lesbian” becoming something of a catchphrase.) Although sometimes straight women do experiment (especially during sweeps week *eyeroll*). On the other hand, Carrie did date a bisexual guy in one episode, but the way it was presented it kinda came off like “oh those young people, what with their wacky bisexuality!”.
  • Sherlock:
    • Irene Adler, a professional dominatrix who has both female and male clients but, upon acknowledging her feelings for Sherlock, was quick to clarify that she is, in fact, a lesbian, and that where Sherlock is concerned she merely suffers from a case of If It’s You, It’s Okay.
    • It’s Played for Laughs, and we’re never given any real cause to believe that he’s anything other than heterosexual, but John’s response every time someone implies that he and his best friend Sherlock are a couple is: “I’m not gay!” Considering that the creator Mark Gatiss once said “I think a lot of people who say they are bisexual aren’t.”, this is likely intentional…
  • A Shot at Love, a reality series based around the concept of having Tila Tequila dating (completely) straight men and (total) lesbians, to, as promos put it, “choose” whether to be straight or gay. There have been several hints that Amanda is bisexual, though it’s been entirely for comedy.
  • In Soap, nominally “gay” Jodie (Billy Crystal) seems to have more girlfriends and have sex with more women than most of the straight male cast put together!
  • The Steve Wilkos show, while generally making a point of showcasing the scum of the earth regardless of sexual orientation, sometimes uses this as a way to further demonize some already skeevy people. A man accused of orally sodomizing his four-year-old niece supposedly admitted to a lie-detector test administrator that he’d had sexual relationships with men in the past, and that he preferred men to women. Despite being in a long-term sexual relationship with a woman at the time, everyone on the show condemned it as being a further element of his monstrosity. Even Steve chewed him out for not just admitting that he was gay and living an ordinary gay life, because “if you have sex with men, you’re gay”.
  • This is the fandom’s hot button in Supernatural concerning Dean Winchester and his feelings for Castiel when he’s been said not to be gay. And that’s probably all that should be said about that.
  • One of the two jokes used on Three’s Company was Jack posing as a gay man so the conservative Mr. Roper (and, later, the moronic Mr. Furley) would allow him to share an apartment with two unmarried women. The possibility of him being bisexual was brought up once … with Jack taking the entire episode to figure out that that would get him kicked out just as quickly as being straight.
  • Karen from Will and Grace, though played by the openly bisexual Megan Mullally, was never explicitly described as bi, but she certainly expressed interest in men and women alike. Another episode featured Matt Damon as a straight guy trying to pretend he’s gay to join the gay men’s chorus. When he checks out a woman, Jack says “Holy Anne Heche Laffoon, he’s straight!,” thus invoking the trope for a character and a real person.
  • The title character of Xena: Warrior Princess is often thought to be lesbian because of her love for Gabrielle, despite seeming to enjoy sex and relationships with many men (Ares, Marcus, etc). One might argue the same with Gabrielle.
  • In Girls, Hannah’s ex Elijah Krantz is generally portrayed as “having always been gay” despite his attraction to women in the past. He tries to “prove” he is bisexual, and him not enjoying the sex is seen as objective evidence for his homosexuality, ignoring what he identifies as.
  • Castle, more than once. In Kill The Messenger a male suspect is revealed to have been having sex with a man at one point, and this is treated as unassailable proof that he could not have had sex with a woman.
  • Invoked in True Blood when Jessica catches her then-boyfriend James having an affair with Lafayette. She tells Jason about it who instantly assumes he’s gay, even though James was clearly in love with Jess and enjoyed having sex with her. She thinks he’s “confused” even though he’s at least 70 years old (having been turned into a vampire as a young man in the 1960′s) and would most likely have a grip on his sexuality by now. She was conveniently blind to the fact that she was a shitty girlfriend, and that is why he cheated on her; his bisexuality simply made Lafayette a viable option.
  • In one episode of How I Met Your Mother, Ted states that he hates a man named Gary Blauman because they were in competition for a girl. Later, Barney’s gay brother James reveals he also hates Gary because he cheated on his husband with him and blames him for his divorce. Ted immediately (and correctly) deduces that Gary is gay and that the latter was actually fighting with the girl for him. Nobody suggests that having an affair with a man and flirting with a girl are not incompatible.

Newspaper Comics

  • In Nine Chickweed Lane, Seth spends a large chunk of time trying to coax Edda’s uncle, Roger out of the closet, never once considering that Roger might be attracted to men AND love his wife — nope he’s just an extreme closet case who managed to conceive eleven children (after the second set of twins he was basically stuck). This is made even more egregious later on when Seth continued to assert his gayness after sleeping with diva ballerina, Fernanda. The latter is Handwaveed by an earlier revelation that Seth was attracted to “true artistry” and thus was seduced by Fernanda’s dancing skills. And after Edda revealed that, aside from her childhood friend Amos, Seth was the only man she ever loved he seemed to be really fighting the urge to sleep with her.


Video Games

  • BioWare usually averts this trope in most of their original settings, since at least one of the potential